Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Where to begin ...

Yes, I'm sorry. I know I've been neglectful. The merry-go-round never slowed down - never gave me the chance to get off, to catch my breath.

There's just so much to tell that I'm going to have to satisfy myself with just touching upon the basics - and moving on. If time allows, I can expand on particular points later.

My last post has me facing my 3rd cancer scare in less than two years, the marriage of my youngest son ... the death of my "last Daddy."

A bit of the worst of times - and a bit of the best.

Happy stuff first. Son and daughter-in-law are now happily married, and living a bit futher north, on a university campus. He's in his last year of studying to be a molecular biologist, and she's in her first year of stretching her little wings. I love the two of them so much that I actually get a sharp twang just under my ribs when I think about them. Have a blessed life, you two. Make me lots of grandbabies. Keep snuggling and bickering ... teasing and laughing ... it's all so damn short ...

Pop is gone, but he's still really with us. My mother-in-law and I have begun "banging around" together - an improbable pair! We've discovered - after 27 years of knowing each other - that we have a lot in common. Sitting at Pop's bedside every day with her has allowed me to see her with completely new eyes. Thank God. Now I'm just sorry that I didn't recognize her as a friend many many years ago.

The latest cancer scare - panned out. The entire scene has left me so disturbed inside that I've stopped seeing all of the doctors - well, all but one. I'm still seeing the nephrologist every four months. I know I'm asking for trouble, but I have a feeling that trouble is going to happen anyway. I'm taking this time to assess what I think of medicine - the way it is today, compared to the way it was 30 years ago. I can see some areas that are going to get a lot worse before they improve - and I don't think they're going to be obvious to the casual observer - or to those in the profession itself. More on that later.

Sometime in June, in a decision that surely came from desperation, I made a life altering decision. I decided to go back to college. Things fell into place so quickly, that I barely had the time to brace for impact. So - here I am - a 53 year old grandmother - trying to fill my old brain full of new information. ( And I can't even remember if I took my pills ... O.o )

I'm starting out with Health Information Technology, with the intention of moving on to Medical Informatics - as soon as I get up the courage to leave home, and study in a classroom, rather than over the internet. I'm exhilarated ... I'm terrified. The first session is already over, and I'm amazed that I emerged from it with a 4.0. (My old teachers would be too, God rest them.) I don't know if the online environment is just easier for me, or if I've actually grown smarter with age. Not likely. More experienced ... more given to introspection ... maybe wiser ... but not smarter. Maybe it was just the courses: Critical Thinking and Medical Terminology.

And now ... on to the classroom perched on my lap. Perhaps I'll get around to writing a bit more on this now. I've got plenty to say - but it's so much work to organize it all into something coherent as it claws its way out of me ...

... and really, does it matter anyway?

Until next time ...

2 Comments:

Blogger AB5SY said...

Thank you for your recent visit to my blog and taking time to leave a comment, I have a number of folks who drop in on a regular bases....but few every offer feed back.

It's great that you've returned to school and blog'n, hopefully it will fill your days, depression is not only unhealthy but makes for long, boring days.........been there.

Trust in the Lord.

Sunday, November 06, 2005 6:31:00 PM  
Blogger AB5SY said...

I left an answer to your question at my blog about the Honda ad. a friend had sent it to me.

Tuesday, November 08, 2005 12:02:00 PM  

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